Forget what I said on Saturday, March 28 about forgiving negligence towards children.

Youngsters these days, it seems like they spend >50% of their time at parties taking pictures of themselves at parties. It's like the experience is less important than the documentation of the experience. And it's not like I take few photos, well, OK, it is like I take few photos. I take photos at special occasions and suchlike but not at like the weekly drinkfest (which I don't, of course, engage in, but did when I was "young" and of the age when nowadays youngsters take pictures of their everyday partying experiences). Whew!

I get really fucked off at my father + stepmother when I take the family dog for a walk. Somehow I can forgive them their negligence towards the children. The kids have siblings, they have an external support system, they can process, they can eventually create lives in some way separate from their caretakers. But the dog, his existence is a product of their negligence that cannot in any way realize that any discomfort he is feeling is not his fault, he can't come to understand and forgive, he can't seek meaning in their behavior beyond himself, he just is made to feel constantly bad. Ugh. I can't deal with it. And all their well-intentionedness, which is something of a mitigating factor when it comes to kids, is utterly moot when it comes to the dog. I can't stand it. It makes me right angry.

So, recently H wrote me a message that made me think that there are two types of people* in this world. She was saying that while clearing out her closet she discovered some items that she had had for the past 15 years and she was chucking them out, in general disbelief that she had had these things for so long. Me, I have things like that, that I've had that long, and longer, and when I use them I am _so_ _thrilled_ to have had them for so long and to not have had to acquire new ones, and I wouldn't DREAM of throwing them** out. I am replete with relief that I have these things that have turned out to be so intransient, bound to me, and durable.

There is a general principle to comment on here, but I think I'll skip writing about it for the time being.

* at least. At least two.

** You understand, it doesn't matter what the "them" is.

My great-aunt told me the other day that I have to stop focusing on being a part of other people's lives and start focusing on leading my own life. My head thinks she's right but the rest of me is sort of comfortable.

I have to admit I was a little shocked and horrified today when I read something. In the interests of maintaining another's integrity I will not give details, but it was bad.

Really, I am ridiculously sentimental.