I went to an LGBTQ workshop this morning. A few thoughts.

1. Key quote regarding terminology about how the majority treats the minority: "Traffic jams are to be tolerated; people are to be accepted and celebrated."
• This fits with W's dissertation research about "tolerance" of others not leading to anything good. People, stop thinking "tolerance" is a goal we should strive towards. It really isn't.
• As cheesy as it sounds, I really like the idea of celebrating people. I like it. So there.
2. I found the atmosphere, which was so supportive and inclusive and mindful of our individual unique experiences (the facilitator repeated quite a few times that we should "take care of ourselves" to make sure that what we are doing is authentic and feels good to us), to be a misrepresentation of actual interactions with people whom we might have to confront about homophobia/transphobia/etc. People do not respond with interest and an open heart when You tell them that what they just said or did is not cool. Even if You target their behavior and not their identity. They are resistant and they are quick to defend their own intent and dismiss the impact their behavior might have on others (especially when those others are absent). I think this workshop should have recognized that most contexts do not provide such security of expression.
• Regardless, I think people do not take care of themselves enough. People, take care of Yourselves. Mind Your own emotions and act accordingly.
3. I am going to write an email now to someone reacting more explicitly to a comment made by that someone yesterday that I reacted to but probably not explicitly enough to make that someone think about what I was reacting to.
4. When I am lecturing I usually limit my examples to family relationships that have nothing to do with romantic relationships. So, I use my brothers rather than "my husband/boyfriend/girlfriend" when I talk about communication or whatever. Partly this is due to the fact that I never have a romantic partner. Partly it is because I am aware that embracing my own heteronormativity in front of them would not be neutral to some students. But I am thinking about how to navigate these examples in a way that makes it clear that what I identify as is irrelevant, but also that what they identify as should be "celebrated".
5. I appreciated the way the guy emphasized that "identify as" is a subjectively more agentic term than "am". I buy that.